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Chris Locke's Comedy Blog.


Top 5 excuses from the Modern Wife

Here are the Top 5 excuses a modern wife will give to get out of having sex with you.

1) Your toes are freezing. What are you, a dead body?

2) You stink. Why don't you have a shower. What are you, a dead body?

3) You're getting blood all over the bed. What are you, a dead body?

4) Harold, turn off the light. Harold? Harold? What are you, a dead body?

5) I'll give you a handjob but that's it.

You have just read the top 5 ways your wife can tell that she's in bed with a dead body.


Salamander said...

prepare for someone on twitter to find this and write "was that about a wife not wanting to have sex? or was it a dead body?" I got a bunch of those with my vampire / wife cheating thing. "what is this, wife cheating? or vampires?" People dont' get the joke that is the joke of things. That's the JOKE!

David said...

wut is diz? sexz or ded body?

Chris Locke said...

I'm just going to tell them that it's a joke about Harold