Twitter / chrislockefun

Chris Locke's Comedy Blog.

11/16/09

My Heart Attack.




A couple of nights ago, while I was doing some hammering in my backyard, I had a heart attack.
My life flashed before my eyes and I thought; you know, my life's been pretty good so far. If I was to die right now... it was an alright trip- This thing called life.

I lived to be Forty-Five.

I've got a beautiful red-headed wife and some children to inherit all of my money.

I got to eat a lot of different types of cheeseburgers.

I got to pet a shark on the nose in Bermuda.

I got to lay on a hot beach.

Just me and God's hot beach and clear blue ocean.

I've got the most hats out of all my brothers.

I got to see some pretty ladies

I got to go on a skiing vacation.

I got to ski down a mountain.

Just me and God's mountain and clear blue sky.

I got to rent a pair of skis and poles.

I saw an older lady die at my church.

I got to drink a lot of beer.

I experienced a heart attack... which was crazy.

I love potato chips.

One of my friends is a pilot.

I've got a fur coat for men.

I got to paint a picture of my Dad.

I got to eat a lot of food from all over the world. Here in this city and in Bermuda and Aspen, Colorado.

I was shown on the local news one time when my friends and I were eating chicken wings.

I got to eat all kinds of chicken wings.

I got to experience a day where I thought everyone looked the same.

I suffered from exhaustion.

I had a nice dog.

4 comments:

Duke of Spook said...

"I've got the most hats out of all my brothers."

I think I like this one the best because I can relate to it

Salamander said...

"I got to paint a picture of my dad" I guess it seems like a privilege when its not an obligation. i HAD to paint a picture of my dad. I was up most of the night!

Unknown said...

"I got to experience a day where I thought everyone looked the same."

Glad I'm not the only one.

xoxo

Robert Dayton, Junior said...

Was the Dad painting done using watercolours? Cuz that kinda paint makes me misty-eyed.

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